Positively Parenting

By David Couper

1. Come home early one day.

Surprise your kids by picking them up.  Make your partner’s day by meeting them after they finish work and have some dinner or go and see a movie.  Or just clean up the house and have take out ready for the gang.

2. Have a work-free weekend.

For some of you this may be easy maybe you don’t work at weekends normally, but for many of us this is tough. Take Saturday AND Sunday off.  Turn off your phone AND your Blackberry and don’t check your email.   Don’t even think about work AND your boss!

3. Say “no” to your boss.

Instead of saying “yes” to that extra overtime or new project, just say “no”.  Sometimes it feels good to take back your own power, be yourself, or even to surprise your boss by not being a pushover!  It doesn’t have to be confrontational.  Saying no is only you choosing not to do something.  Period!

4. Say “yes” to your boss.

Instead of saying no to the extra overtime or new project, just say “yes”. Surprise your boss by doing something you don’t normally do.  If you never go to work at weekends, while others do, volunteer once to help out.  If you never have lunch with your buddies go for it in the New Year.  If you never volunteer, turn over a new leaf and try raising your hand.

5. Give another working parent a break.

If you notice that another mom or dad is swamped with work and their kid is sick offer to help out.  If you see that your neighbor is working two jobs and raising two kids offer to have the kids over and make them dinner.  And your good deeds don’t have to be limited to working parents.  You could help out a single co-worker, friend or family member.

6. Do something for you.

That means do something for you and not for work or for your family or even for your favorite charity.   Get a manicure or a steak or a bunch of flowers.  Spend half an hour reading Vogue, Sports Illustrated or even a book.  Focusing on yourself is not only fun it’s empowering.

7. Do a little dreaming.

You’re welcome to dream at night but also dream during the day.  Takes some time out to do nothing.  Instead of doing – completing tasks and getting tasks completed – take some time for reflection.  Find a quiet spot; listen to some music if that helps and switch of as you focus on your future, what you love about your present life, and your learning from the past.

8. Learn something new.

Take a class, read a book or go to a new website.  Learn something about you, or your job or a company you’re interested.  If you have always said you would learn Swedish, soccer, or Salsa take one step towards that goal.  Learning keeps your mind young!

9. Take one step to a better career.

If you hate your job think about what a new job might look like.  Talk to your boss about promotion or a transfer.  Put your resume together.  Do some informational interviews in a new industry or with someone who is more senior than you and whom you admire.

10.  Listen.

Listen to what your friends are saying, and your family, and even your co-workers.  But also listen to what your heart is saying to you.  If you don’t love your work and really want to be with your family or you really want to go back to work because diapers are driving you nuts, maybe now is the time to make some tough decisions.

Happy 2011!

David Couper is the author of eight books including his newest, Outsiders on the Inside: Creating a Winning Career Even When You Don’t Fit In. He is also an award-winning trainer and coach in the U.S., Europe and Asia and the father of four-year old Teddy. Email David with comments and questions.