Positively Parenting

By Steve Olsher

How can you help facilitate this? So many children (and adults for that matter) meander through life and never identify their unique, innate talent.

To help your child realize true contentment, it’s imperative that you teach her to heed the inherent blueprint that naturally exists. Within this blueprint, your child will discover her what—the one thing she was born to do. And, once revealed, everything else (almost magically) falls into place.

With college (and, for some, private school) being the single most expensive investment of time, energy, and money your family will make, a solid return is mandatory. The days of choosing which school to attend using the same process as we select candy bars (what looks good, what you can afford, what your friends like, what your parents insist upon, etc.) are over.

The last thing you want is for your child to dedicate years to something in which she has no genuine interest and to leave school with a lack of clarity as to what’s next. Getting your child on path early to identifying what she is compelled to do is crucial.

To help your child discover her what, there are six pro-active steps you can immediately take:

Identify what she absolutely loves. Like magnets, we are naturally drawn to certain things and repulsed by others. Discuss her favorite toys, books, movies, and TV shows. Open an honest dialogue about what she finds appealing and look for commonalities among what she is attracted to.

Identify what he loathes. The soul doesn’t lie. Trying to force a square peg into a round hole will only result in pain. He knows what he is attracted to and what repels him.

Provide an hour of free time and let her make suggestions about what to do. By giving her the freedom to choose, she will suggest the activities she enjoys most.

Discuss family members, friends, teachers, coaches, spiritual leaders, etc. and the character traits they display. Talk about what he finds appealing and unappealing. Interestingly, what we admire in others most directly reflects what we want for ourselves and our own natural inclinations.

Look for moments when she accomplished something she put her mind to and discuss these with her. What was it about these moments that encouraged her to excel? Someone? Something? As Tony Robbins says, “Success leaves clues.” Within these victories lie the keys to unlocking her full potential.

Compile the information from these five steps and make a list. Immerse him in the activities he loves, surround him with the people he identified as being of positive influence, and weed out those activities (unless, of course they’re daily chores) that do not serve him well.

Ultimately, what your child loves to do will float to the surface. This process takes time and there will certainly be moments of hit or miss.

The bottom line is that we are each put on this planet to do one amazing thing and it is our responsibility as parents to help cultivate that which our child is naturally drawn to. Your child wants to discover her what. By following these pro-active steps, you have significantly increased the odds of her finding it.

Steve Olsher is the author of USA Book News’ “Self-Help Book of the Year,” Journey To You: A Step-by-Step Guide to Becoming Who You Were Born to Be, Founder of The Reinvention Workshop, and host of Reinvention Radio. Visit Steve’s website at www.steveolsher.com or contact him via email at steve@steveolsher.com